Anger is a natural emotion.If we naturally felt our anger by expressing it ,if we let it live for a minute in order to move through it we would be fine.But problems arise when we either express anger inappropriately by blowing up or suppress it so that it accumulates.We end up either giving a situation more of our anger than it deserves,or none of it.
Suppressed anger does not simply evaporate,it becomes unfinished business.Many people were raised in families where showing any anger was wrong.Others come from families where even the slightest problem escalated to rage.It is no wonder we have no good role models foe expressing this natural emotion.instead of understanding what to do with anger ,we question it,wonder if it is valid,misplace it and do just about everything we can except feel it.But anger is a normal reaction,useful at the right time and place,and in the proper portions.
Anger does not have to be a horrible beast that consumes our lives.It's just a feeling.It's a feeling to be experienced,not judged.Like all our feelings ,anger is a form of communication,it brings us a message.Unfortunately,many of us no longer hear its message because we often do not know how to feel it.
Anger tells us that we haven't dealt with our hurt.Hurt is present pain ,while anger is often lingering pain.We can accumulate many hurts and it becomes hard to sort them out,eventually ,even hard to recognize the anger.
Anger held internally ,changes our impressions of the past and distorts our view of current reality.
We must be allowed to express our anger and must give ourselves permission to do so.We are here to heal and move through our feelings.Like little babies we can learn to be more honest and express our anger.We can learn to live lives where anger is a feeling that passes,not a state of being.